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The overdressed shop assistant’s questions (00000420)
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2.9/5 (116 Votes)
I (f/20) would like to confess that overdressed shop assistants intimidate me. I am no wall flower and I don't look bad myself, but the problem for me are the modern, overdressed shop assistants who give you the once over as soon as you walk into the shop. Every now and again I look around in a boutique because the clothes they have on offer are quite different from mainstream shops. I mean, most shop assistants are nice and polite, just customer-oriented; however I feel uncomfortable in their presence. I picture them thinking immediately, "Oh god, that bag does not go with those shoes!" etc. Also, the endless questions about why I don't want those trousers annoy me. Just the same as the reproachful "so you didn't find anything?" Or the pushy "but that top looked great on you". The same goes for the cosmetics counter. When I go to the cosmetics section because of a product, a blemish is taken for a reason to push another product on me. "Yes, the lipstick goes perfectly. But there on your cheek I can see an enlarged pore. Would you not like to try our pore reducing serum for 59 euros?" Hereby I confess that I don’t have enough self-confidence, otherwise I wouldn't care what such-and-such a shop assistant thinks of me. Secretly I wish for unconventional types, like fat, happy, older women or young women with dreadlocks as shop assistants.

Posted on 06.05.2013, 22:42:41 CET
Falling asleep with Bob Ross (00000416)
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2.7/5 (43 Votes)
I (f/20) have had some sleep problems for about 2 years now. It doesn't matter how early I get up, I cannot manage to fall asleep before 3 or 4 in the morning. I am actually extremely tired but I just can’t go to sleep. Instead, I lie there in bed for hours and get bored. Sometimes I am so frustrated that I just scream and throw myself here and there because I am so pissed off with myself and my inability to sleep. Of course in the mornings I can sleep! All I need to do is turn my alarm to "sleep" for five minutes and I don't wake up until hours later, which is obviously too late. But evenings? No way. I have tried everything; calming tea, warm milk, some sort of valerian "mist" nothing, I mean nothing helped. I was therefore at the end of my tether when I discovered my very own personal hero and knight in shining armor, Bob Ross. I can't put in to words how I felt when I discovered the effect he had on me. I was flicking through videos on YouTube when my glance fell on the recommended videos on the right-hand side of the screen. A "Joy of Painting" video by Bob Ross, 26 minutes long. I don't know what came across me, but I thought "Why not? If you can't sleep, you might as well use the time wisely and learn to paint or something". I clicked on the video and was mesmerised on the spot. That calming voice. Those nice, irrelevant sayings. That wonderful soft speech about some clouds and that chuckle when he breaks his paintbrush. I fell in love immediately. And fell into a deep sleep ten minutes later. Since then I have slept perfectly. I just need my daily dose of Bob Ross and everything is good. The only problem is just that I really cannot sleep without him at all anymore. So whenever I stay at my boyfriend's house or sleep over at a friend's, I have to wait until they have dropped off so that I can secretly listen to Bob Ross on my mobile phone. I would find it far too embarrassing to admit that I have become so dependent on this man that I have downloaded every one of his videos to my phone. Now I have listened to all his episodes and replay the same ones again and again. I actually already know them off by heart. It wouldn't be all that bad, but recently I have started to whisper along with the text. I find it somehow creepy and I am very worried that somebody will find out that I lie in bed at night and whisper "clouds are very free" like an old madwoman.

Posted on 06.05.2013, 02:57:11 CET
My monster burp (00000406)
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2.7/5 (72 Votes)
When I (w) lived in my first apartment in my early 20s, I had a neighbor. An older bachelor, nothing remarkable. Only his extremely loud snoring drew my attention. The walls in this house were very thin and his bedroom apparently backed on to mine, so the noise from next door was often really noticeable. One day in the discount shop on the corner there was no more still water left, only sparkling, which I drank out of necessity. The next night I woke up thirsty and drank a lot of water, whilst the neighbor was busily snoring away again. Suddenly an incredible monster burp popped out of me. A booming roar, louder than I had ever experienced. At that moment the grunting abruptly stopped on the other side of the wall. I had actually burped the old man awake. I bet he never got woken up by a woman like that. When we next met at the garbage room he looked at me quite strangely. I dedicate this little story to the portion of the male population who do not want to believe that women do the same things as men. Honestly boys, how do you imagine the female organism to work? Yes, I confess that I burp and fart often and gladly, when I am alone. When something is in the pipeline, so to speak, no matter what direction, then out it comes. Just as nature intended, and you feel much better straight away!

Posted on 30.04.2013, 23:08:50 CET
Vacation for All! (00000398)
0 comments
2.8/5 (80 Votes)
When I was in the army, I was employed in the administrative office. It was never the post that I would have wanted, but I got it, unfortunately, since only six weeks after an operation, I was not able to take part in train service. I was transferred to another company because of the lack of staff in the offices. So I ruled my office and began working on all documents. My predecessor was a lazy pig (after three years, no proper filing system, one year without a filing cabinet, etc.) and then to make matters worse, I found a drawer containing almost 400 unused leave passes. Out of sheer laziness, I shredded half of them. So now everyone gets vacation! I only denied every day of annual leave to the guy who left me the job. I know that it was wrong and that I could have put forth a little effort, but I was just too lazy at that point in time. I still ask for forgiveness, but I'm sure it served a good purpose.

Posted on 26.04.2013, 01:24:45 CET


The Chicken (00000394)
2 comments
2.9/5 (113 Votes)
My brother (8) has always been a very quiet and shy child. Unfortunately it's the case that this kind of child is bullied and harassed by others. When I was visiting my parents, he sometimes told me with tears in his eyes how cruel the other children are to him, and sometimes it’' almost unbelievable what goes on at this elementary school. The teacher has long since noticed this problem of course, so I asked her for help several times, but it seems like she isn't doing anything. I've also spoken to the main bully before school many times while his mother was there, but the chicken just laughed at me and went away with his shrugging mother. Now for my confession. A few days ago, I (f/24) was visiting my parents again, and since the weather was so nice, I took my brother and one of his friends to the playground. After about an hour, the bully and another boy showed up. I don't know if he noticed me, but he started cursing my brother and his friend right away. Rarely in my life have I experienced such a negative atmosphere. It's hard to believe the kind of language he was using. Just when I was getting up from the bench to give a piece of my mind to this chicken, he picked up a rock and slammed it into my brother's head. I saw red. I ran over and grabbed the boy by his T-shirt and lifted him off the ground. He looked at me completely shocked, but then he laughed loudly and said, "I'm not afraid of girls!" I was so angry at this moment that I slapped him several times. I only left him alone when he started to cry. I am quite shocked at my behavior. I really love my brother more than anything, but I would never have thought that I would be capable of such a thing. It goes against all my principles, and I'm really sorry. I wasn't in control of myself. I have no idea if this boy told his parents about it or not. But anyway, he's left my brother alone since then.

Posted on 27.04.2013, 23:23:30 CET

82 Sins (Kategorie Curiosity).



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