With all my sincere apologies to my friend, I wanted to confess this. I lied to my friend that I was unmarried. She believed it. She was my co-worker. We developed so much rapport with each other, that we shared all personal things except my marital status. I know I was lying but could not help.
We became really close friends, and shared lunches, trips to temples, street walks, and even one evening. She dared to ask why I am not getting married. I could sense what could go wrong there, and asked her to keep calm and sleep. It was in my car back to home. Her home was very near to my home. We never visited each other home though.
Sensing a much closer, I decided to keep distance and slowly started avoiding her. She also sensed that asked why I am doing so. I did not have a specific answer, but I said nothing like that.
After some time, she married someone else and went to USA.
I know, I did lie, and I know she was deeply in love with me. But before any damage happens, my senses came back. She is now happily living there, but still sometimes her memories come back.
I, as a person, have a tendency to lie, cheat, and manipulate. I'm secretive, and I make up excuses. There is no other way to put it. I'm unreliable, hide certain things and manipulate people. I also live in my imagination, an opinion of what I want the world to be. Reality matters not to me, because I've found a better substitute. I find nothing wrong with the things I do in the real world, and my own mind. I am a shady, insane, and a poor excuse for a human being.
About eight years ago an external consulting firm came into our company and examined everything. Like all other business consultancies they came to the conclusion that staff numbers should be cut. Consequently the older employees in particular were under pressure to leave the company with a financial settlement. I was 58 at the time and was therefore also under pressure. But I was stubborn and so I was put under more and more pressure by my managers in the form of appraisal interviews. Since I was still being obstinate, they finally tried the last means of pressure: they put me in the so-called death chamber. That was a small office, equipped with a desk, an office chair, a computer and a telephone. Officially my field of work was outstanding expenses. However, I had no tasks at all, was not invited to meanings, I was completely cut out of any flow of information. All the colleagues that this had happened to ended up on their knees after 3 months at the latest and begged for premature retirement, because they couldn't put up with the torture of isolation.
At first I managed it by spending several hours of the day playing chess on the internet. Then I opened an account for online poker. I would spend the whole day there, from morning till evening, with a short break for lunch. The day would fly by. At the beginning I kept making losses, but I learnt from it and gradually started winning, and after three months I would make on average 300-400 Euros worth of winnings. Every day I went to my "workplace" gladly and often even did overtime. I didn't tell anyone about my poker playing. My managers were confused. One of them was punished for not freezing me out. My colleagues were either annoyed about me, the lazy sod who earned a fat pay check for doing nothing, or they laughed themselves silly at me. So I carried on, until I went into retirement at the normal age of 63. Then I stopped playing poker; I'd had enough. I confess that I damaged my firm because of my stubbornness and that I inflicted losses on other poker players due to my winnings. Perhaps I should have left earlier?
Nearing the end of the year 2012, me and my best friend were exhausted and sick of school so we decided to skip school for a couple days, but days became weeks which got really worse that the I got caught came. But the thing is, what I dreaded more was that my parents and the police would find out, my friend was not as innocent as I once thought she was. She stole from every single clothing line in the mall, I was absolutely god smacked and impressed by the sum of clothes she took. As a gullible teenager, I once was I surprised her by snatching 2 coke cans, and a mars bar from the supermarket. Together we both stole nearly $600 dollars worth of items. My mother asked me where I got the clothes from I lied to her and said that I 'got them from a friend', but there was that moment of realization i knew that my actions were wrong and I'm probably going to be found out soon so the next day my best friend asked if I wanted to do go and shoplift I said no, a week after she was taken in by police, and I knew it would be the same for me if I continued.