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Collect Them All (00000120)
2.5/5 (219 Votes)
In 4th grade the new craze were these little "the dog" stuffed animals from McDonalds. I would beg for my mom to take me to McDonalds to try and collect as many as I could. One day this girl in one of my classes, who I thought was crazy, had the toy I had been after, a German Shepard. I befriended her and played her dumb little games while hiding my hatred for her. She then traded me the toy for a different one. After the deed was done, I stopped playing with her and ignored her. This angered her, and she complained to the teacher saying that she wanted her toy back. The teacher proclaimed it a fair trade, and I was off the hook. I regret nothing. I did, however, go to great lengths to steal one of these toys from my handicapped cousin. I'm just thankful I didn't get caught. I was not so lucky a few months ago when I was caught shoplifting. I only regret it because I got caught.

Posted on 01.08.2011, 07:18:29 CET
Place: Texas, USA
Saved by the Phone (00000118)
2.6/5 (182 Votes)
I cheated on a test and got the highest score in the class. I told people that I studied a lot more, but instead, I simply saved all of the notes on my cell phone and looked them up during the test.

Posted on 09.07.2011, 18:38:31 CET
Place: Jackson, MS, USA
Mocca on the coffee table (00000116)
2.4/5 (220 Votes)
I (m/21) recently became old enough to drink. My friends invited me to a party at their apartment where I exceeded my limit. I didn't throw up, but I got mega drunk. And in the middle of the night I didn't want to walk all the way to the bathroom to take a dump. My friends coffee-table, however, was right by to me. So they awoke the next morning, hungover, and seeing someone had taken a massive shit on their coffee table. They were extremely pissed. Needless to say my friends still don't know it was me.

Posted on 28.03.2011, 23:36:57 CET
Lies with benefit (00000109)
2.6/5 (159 Votes)
I must confess, I'm a precocious liar. I lie for the sport of lying. Just to know that I can, that I'm good at it. I take pride in lying, and will often tell the stupidest lie I can fathom just to see if I can. I've gotten quite good.

Take for example my scar. I have a scar on my right arm from a childhood burn. I have told so many stories, ranging from "I got shot" to "Nothing", however, there is one that I'd like to share. I was with a girl at the time, she considered me to be very handsome for some reason and wanted to pursue a relationship. She caught glimpse of my arm and asked what happened.
I proceeded to tell her that when I was a young man I was violently raped in my arm by a large knife wielding man, This of course never happened but she believed every bit of it and in return pleased me behind a 7/11.
Tags: Lust Lie Pride

Posted on 12.07.2011, 06:57:22 CET
Place: Amarillo, TX

Supply closet (00000108)
2.7/5 (253 Votes)
When I was in the 5th grade, I got picked to help out in the office at lunch every other week. I sorted papers and gave ice to kids with injuries and all that helpful stuff that only a 12-year-old can do. In the office there was this huge supply closet. Now when I say huge, I mean that in every sense of the word. Everything you could ever need was in that closet. Everything. Sadly, and complying with all the rules of things one really wants, I wasn't allowed to have any of this stuff. All those wonderful fine-tipped markers, sticky tack, tape, erasers and so on.

I would never be allowed to take it for myself. One night as I was lying in my bed and fuming at the unfairness of all the stuff I would never be able to use, I had a wonderful idea. The next day when I went to school, I wore a large, baggie hoodie with a really big front pocket. When there was a brief lull in activity, I went in the supply closet, claiming I was cold. This was a valid reason to go in there and close the door because for some reason it was always sweltering in the room regardless of the temperature in the office. Once inside, I put as much stuff in my pocket as I could without it being noticeable. From there, I would just take it home with me.

I repeated this every day until I had at least one of everything, even the things I didn't need. When my friends found out, I ended up getting a menagerie of things for them, too. This continued for pretty much the entire year. No one ever found out about it, but the secretary did mention once that she had no idea where all the tape went. She thinks I was laughing at the funny little mystery that had presented itself. That couldn't have been farther than the truth. I love getting away with things.

Posted on 09.07.2011, 01:43:45 CET
Place: Roseville, MI

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