I (m/26) am the head of the programming department and manage two subordinates at a company that produces radiology information systems. The atmosphere in the company (12 people including the boss) is very relaxed. The ideal workplace! Now for what's on my mind: I have remote access to all of our customer's servers. My mother called me and told me that she went to the doctor with suspected breast cancer. She called many radiologists, but the earliest available appointment wasn't for three weeks! I didn't hesitate and put her down in appointment books and the waiting lists for the best radiologists with the best equipment. I changed everything by hand in the database tables so that it didn't look suspicious. At 8:00 am the next day, my mother got her results, and two days later she had chemotherapy. People always told her that she was lucky to have gotten an appointment so quickly because otherwise they might not have gotten a handle on the disease. I'm not ashamed because I helped someone close to me, but my conscience is plagued by the thought that maybe someone else would still be alive today if they had gotten that appointment instead of my mother.
A few years ago, when I was 15, on my way home from my bus stop as usual. I had already noticed a boy a few times who bullied his peers. I was really angry with him. He bullied one boy, for example, because he was fat. Another kid was fairly small and wore glasses, and he often threw him off his bike or blocked his way home. They were his age. Those kind of kids really annoy me, the ones that bully people without any background knowledge. The fat boy, for example, had battled leukemia for hears and became fat because of his medication. He still has to take it today, but he is healthy. He damn well canâ€™t help it, exactly like the other boy. Both boys hadn't done anything to the guy and unfortunately let him do anything to them. On the day I mentioned, the bully surpassed anything that had happened before. I had often told him to leave them alone, but because I was a woman and often elegantly dressed, I think he didn't take me seriously. I walked a few meters away from them and heard everything start up again. I was so furious that there were tears in my eyes. I turned around. grabbed the boy, took him by the collar, and after screaming at him hit him with all my heart he was thrown down, and kicked him again. His "friends" laughed themselves silly and his "victim" couldn't suppress his laughter either. He stood up almost crying and ran home, looking back every now and then to see if I was following him.
Since then, I think he's left the kids in peace that I've never noticed anything again anyway. I admit that I stooped to his level, but it was worth it. He wasn't responding to words. I haven't told anyone about this because I avoid violence and I can't really be proud of what I did. It just simply had happened, and I ask for forgiveness.
Now turning 27 I suddenly remembered accidentally crushing my pet gerbil when I was 7, and my brother who was 2 years behind had a pet budgie. We had a big blue box full of building play blocks that we always dumped them in the middle of our room, which our pets always found very candid, that sometimes they spontaneously fetched the bricks handing them over to us. Both our pets behaved and co-existed accordingly. Whenever we played and assembled different structures using the blocks, they somehow figured out which of the pieces were needed for us to complete building, even though not all of the parts they brought did fit, we had to put the piece in to avoid disappointing our pets. One night, my father came home from work and we heard our dog barking pretentiously, that I suddenly thought of my pet gerbil and immediately ran to to my room to check, I was shocked when I saw his cage was empty and quickly tried to look for it, thinking it could have made it's way through the door under. I made haste out of my room opening the door when i heard something snap, and that was when i saw heard something snap when I saw my pet gerbil's head cracked open, spurting blood, and convulsing. I immediately called out for my mother crying. Unfortunately it didn't survive the very daunting accident and died a few seconds afterwards. At first, I couldn't understand why he shouldn't be taken to the veterinary. The worst thing was admitting how my pet gerbil died,and for me to take responsibility. Everyone believed my story, even my brother who didn't see what had happened. Now my mother is now deceased, perhaps she'll see my pet gerbil in heaven.
Four years ago, as part of a school exchange program, I (m/20) was in Wroclaw, Poland. Once there, we were assigned to an exchange partner. Everyone hoped to get a cool partner in order to hopefully be cool too. Unfortunately, I was assigned to a totally stuffy, boring guy, but he was very nice and helpful. I was even allowed to sleep in the same room as his sister during the exchange. The first evening, all of the exchange pairs went to a party, but unfortunately not my couch-potato partner and me. Naturally, this annoyed me, and I withdrew fairly quickly into his sister's room. Then I rummaged carefully through the clothes and closets, until I felt an indefinable, but powerful urge for relief. I don't remember why, but I had to jerk off and I had a crazy desire to masturbate into a pair of said exchange sister's socks. After successfully completing the work, I felt shamed and disgusted, but I still tucked the socks back into the deepest depths of the draw and hoped that no one would find them there.
After half a year, it was time to go home, everything went great. I even got a huge bag of gifts, which I only opened after my exchange partner left - luckily. I had long forgotten my unpleasant incident the first night in Poland, but only until I opened the huge gift bag. I was initially happy with the Poland shirts and Vodka, but then I discovered a transparent bag, which literally had this in it: the now yellow, sticky pair of socks that I now saw for the second time. I wish I would have sunk into the ground. I repent.