I would like to confess that I hate going shopping with my girlfriend. There's this one thing in particular: she won't tie up the plastic bags she puts vegetables in, because she thinks the cashier would then weigh the air that's in the bags, too, and that the supposed extra weight would cost her more. Even my explanation that, if the air was being weighed it would tip the scale all the time, falls on deaf ears. Let it be understood that she is very intelligent and in many ways much sharper than your average Joe, but this life-skill naiveté drives me batty.
I was visiting my mom, who had made some lasagna and invited me over. When I got to her house, my father's car was parked in front of the garage, something that doesn't happen very often, because my parents are separated. When I entered the place and went into the living room, everyone was already sitting down at table â€“ my mother, my father, my brother (who still lived with my mother) and his girlfriend. I think at the time they had been together for about half a year. It all seemed pretty odd to me, since familial get-togethers like this at the most happened on birthdays and Christmas. I sat down and took a piece of the lasagna. Then I noticed that my brother's girlfriend wasn't nearly as cheerful as usual. Just to cheer her up a bit and eventually discover what accounted for her peculiar state of mind, I asked jokingly "What on earth is the matter with you? You're not pregnant, are you?" whereupon I started laughing uproariously. Unfortunately, I was the only one laughing.
Last summer I was on the road with a buddy in his convertible. I was way drunk, because earlier I'd inhaled several beers. The roof was down and the "Pirates of the Caribbean" song was playing loud. And he also still had his little son's pirate hat lying in the car. As we stopped at a red light, a police car was behind us. Just for laughs, I put on the hat, unlatched the seat belt, stood up and yelled "This is the day that you will always remember as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow" and started laughing. Well, the policemen didn't think it was quite as funny. They waved us over and my buddy took the hit. Since then I'm not allowed to ride along anymore.
My father was a penny-pinching and rather sarcastic person. So that's why he explained to me as a child, slot machines in bars were for "people with too much money" and that they throw their money in them to get a kick out of the colorful, glowing symbols. I'm now 24 years old, a student, and just found out day before yesterday, that it's actually possible to win money on these machines.
On a cold winter's eve, I (m/22) wanted to meet my buddy at the shopping center for a little shopping. We both had only bikes in those days, and he'd arrived earlier than me and had already locked up his bike. Since I regrettably did not have a lock, I quickly ran inside to let him give me the key to his lock. Ran out again, locked my bike to his and then went to make the round through the arcade with him. After an hour we were ready to take off and went out again. Shock, my bike was gone! His stood there by its lonesome. At some point it dawned on me that I had locked my bike up somewhere completely different. Then I ran to said location and, see, there stood my bike by itself and unlocked. It appears that I attached my bike accidentally to a strange one and that by chance the key fit. I can just imagine the guy lying in his bed evenings, trying to figure out why somebody would do something like that. If you don't know the real reason, it can't make any sense whatsoever.