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Hallucinating (00000297)
0 comments
2.8/5 (94 Votes)
I've ate three horses and killed a baby smurf last day. Well, I was very hungry, but I got super hungry and ate three whole horses. I then proceed to walk in a shopping mall and I saw that baby Smurf. Since the age of 6 I hate the Smurfs and I finally got confronted to one. So I took it to the restroom and drown his head in a toilet bowl. But something in this murder turned me on, so I masturbated for several times and ejaculated on the little smurf. Something weirder happened, her mom saw all the scene, I forced her to give me a blow-job and not repport it to the police, she accepted and enjoyed as well. She asked me to kill her other child. So we had a good time killing the second kid and had loads of sexual relations into the restroom in front of everyone. The end.

Posted on 01.03.2013, 16:57:25 CET
Cookie Monster (00000283)
0 comments
2.9/5 (98 Votes)
I took a cookie when my mom told me not to. I am a very naughty boy. Please forgive me Buddha. I am so sorry for eating all of the cookies. Please forgive me for my gluttony. I am sorry.

Posted on 07.03.2013, 21:21:00 CET
Supply closet (00000108)
0 comments
2.9/5 (217 Votes)
When I was in the 5th grade, I got picked to help out in the office at lunch every other week. I sorted papers and gave ice to kids with injuries and all that helpful stuff that only a 12-year-old can do. In the office there was this huge supply closet. Now when I say huge, I mean that in every sense of the word. Everything you could ever need was in that closet. Everything. Sadly, and complying with all the rules of things one really wants, I wasn't allowed to have any of this stuff. All those wonderful fine-tipped markers, sticky tack, tape, erasers and so on.

I would never be allowed to take it for myself. One night as I was lying in my bed and fuming at the unfairness of all the stuff I would never be able to use, I had a wonderful idea. The next day when I went to school, I wore a large, baggie hoodie with a really big front pocket. When there was a brief lull in activity, I went in the supply closet, claiming I was cold. This was a valid reason to go in there and close the door because for some reason it was always sweltering in the room regardless of the temperature in the office. Once inside, I put as much stuff in my pocket as I could without it being noticeable. From there, I would just take it home with me.

I repeated this every day until I had at least one of everything, even the things I didn't need. When my friends found out, I ended up getting a menagerie of things for them, too. This continued for pretty much the entire year. No one ever found out about it, but the secretary did mention once that she had no idea where all the tape went. She thinks I was laughing at the funny little mystery that had presented itself. That couldn't have been farther than the truth. I love getting away with things.

Posted on 09.07.2011, 01:43:45 CET
Place: Roseville, MI
Red Herring Salad (00000033)
1 comments
2.8/5 (239 Votes)
Every new year's eve our family eats by tradition a red herring salad. I had really stuffed my face cause it's delicious. After dinner, I went out with friends and got locked on vodka. At 3 am, when I was absolutely wasted, I got sick. Since I'd eaten so much red salad my puke was really red. So my friends called an ambulance, they thought it was blood. So far, I haven't told them it wasn't blood. Thank god I can rely on my friends.

Posted on 31.05.2009, 18:22:06 CET
Place: Landungsbrücken, 20459 Hamburg, Germany


Stoned (00000012)
0 comments
3.1/5 (225 Votes)
I have been so stoned once that I ran after a duck, completely convinced it was a pack of cigarettes.

Posted on 23.05.2007, 02:41:59 CET

5 Sins (Kategorie Gluttony).



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